How to win grades and influence teachers

As the school year is about to begin for many students of all ages, I thought this sage advice would be perfect.  I have no idea how this made it into my collection of miscellaneous items nor who the author is.

How to win grades and influence teachers

1. Bring the teacher articles dealing with his subject.
Demonstrate fiery interest and give him timely items to mention to him.  If you can't find articles dealing with his subject, bring in any articles at random.  He thinks everything deals with his subject.

2. Look alert.
Take notes eagerly.  If you look at your watch, don't stare unbelievingly and shake it.

3. Nod frequently and murmer, "How true!"
To you, this seems exaggerated.  To him, it's quite objective.

4. Sit in front, near him.
This only applies if you intend to stay awake.  If you're going to to all the trouble of making a good impression, you might as well let him know who you are, especially in a large class.

5. Laugh at his jokes.
You can tell.  If he looks up from  his notes and smiles expectantly, he has told a joke.

6. Ask for outside reading.
You don't have to read it.  Just ask.

7. Be sure the book you read during the lecture looks like a book from the course.

8. Ask any questions you think he can answer.
Conversely, avoid announcing that you have found the answer to a question he couldn't answer.

9. Call attention to his writing.
Produce an exquisitely pleasant experience connected with the teacher.  If you know he's written a book or an article, ask in class if he wrote it.